


Come Back When You Can

by lovelyrdj



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bucky Barnes Recovering, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Bucky Barnes, Infinity War fucked me up man, M/M, Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Unrequited Love, Wakanda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-05-01 21:05:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14529162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovelyrdj/pseuds/lovelyrdj
Summary: "...and when Steve awoke the next morning, holding the snoring man in his arms; one who's forehead rested gently against Steve's chest, he made himself a promise.He would never allow himself to lose Bucky again."





	Come Back When You Can

Steve had dreamt of this day more times than he cared to count. He had written about it; poems directed to nobody, spilled on the pages of his notebook, garnished with drawings of vines bursting with fragrant jasmine. He had fantasized about the first shared glance, and the feeling of skin brushing against his palms in a way that was all too familiar. 

So, when that burner phone lit up for the first time in months, he was almost as frightened as he was relieved when it came down to opening that one message; the one he had anticipated for as long as he could remember.

"He's awake."

The smallest things bring people the utmost amount of joy. Something as simple as a reminder of love or a compliment from a stranger could alter the outcome of your day in way so extraordinary; so significant. Some could say that it was magic.

Whether or not the theory was true, Steve could say that he had never felt as many emotions at once as he had when those two words joined together..

A few days later, Steve was on the outskirts of a small village, greeting locals and small children with a smile of which was comparable to the kindest gesture one could offer. At his side, the Wakandan king observed the interaction with his arms folded behind his back in patient silence.

"I trust my brother has kept you waiting long enough?" He lifted his gaze, soft and youthful eyes capturing his own. "Whenever you're ready, Captain."

Steve trailed behind Shuri down a winding path leading to an opening in the trees, where an untouched lake mirrored the orange hue of the sky on its surface. At the water's edge stood a figure, as peaceful as the current itself.

"Thank you for this, Shuri." Steve spoke quietly. "I owe you. We both do."

"You owe me nothing except a promise." She said, turning to the lake and blinking thoughtfully. "Barnes is a good man, but he is still healing. What he has gone through cannot be overstated nor can it be erased, but with some nurturing, it can be made so that it no longer causes distress. You must be the nurturer."

Steve nodded, though he couldn't bear to take his eyes off his old friend, even when Shuri's hand found its way to his shoulder. Something inside of him was fearful; fearful that the simple act of looking away would cause Barnes to vanish into thin air.

The walk was short in comparison to just how long the time between meetings had appeared to be, and when Steve finally spoke, his voice betrayed every emotion he had attempted to keep hidden.

Of course, it's not like minded.

"Bucky?"

When he turned to Steve, who was complete with a beard and that smile he couldn't get enough of, Bucky froze. He had been informed of Steve's arrival beforehand and had run through a thousand different scenarios in his head, yet in that moment, he fell short on words; words that would make known the feelings that he had been yearning to confess to that handsome blonde patriot for _so long._ His Steve.

The embrace came with no warning at all, and yet Steve sunk into Bucky's arms, absorbing his body heat and the sweet sensation of his silky-smooth hair on his face. Meanwhile, the nervousness that had built up inside of him prior to the reunion melted from his skin, exposing him to the comforting feeling that was the warmth of the setting sun, illuminating them in its focus; the center of the universe honoring what is and had always been the center of _Steve's_ universe.

The hug couldn't have lasted more than a few moments, yet it made up for the lifetime that they had spent apart. 

By the time the two of them retreated inside the small hut in which Bucky had been given refuge, the crickets were already singing into the night, a small fire glowing from inside. Laughs were shared, as were drinks and stories of simpler times, and when Steve awoke the next morning holding the snoring man in his arms; one who's forehead rested gently against Steve's chest, he made himself a promise.

He would never allow himself to lose Bucky again.

That morning, the two of them watched the sunrise, sharing their personal space despite there being plenty of room within those walls. Bucky then led Steve out to the field where a herd of goats ate without a care in the world, knowing them all by their traditional Wakandan names. Afterword’s, he introduced Steve to a few people within the village; the people who had accepted Bucky into their lives and made him feel welcome in a world that took pride in treating him similar to how one would treat a rabid animal.

Steve hung around for a week during his first visit, not keen on overstaying his welcome. In that short amount of time, however, he prided himself in getting to know every detail of Bucky's new life. He joined him on hikes through the wilderness and assisted the villagers with various tasks such as chopping wood. The next year and a half of his life often took place in the reclusive, magnificent country, and Steve could have sworn that Bucky appeared more at peace with life every day that he remained in Wakanda.

Bucky had found his place in the world, and it was everything that Steve could have ever desired for him.

So, when Steve stood back helplessly, watching as Thanos disappeared with a flash and snap of his fingers, his first thought was as one should have expected.

"...Steve?"

Time slowed to a torturous halt, and the world around him became black and white, the only point of his concentration being Bucky. _His Bucky._

Stumbling forward with his gaze set on the space in which his hands should have been, Bucky lifted his glazed over eyes to Steve's own terrified baby blues. His expression was one of sadness and fatigue; not stemming from battle, but from the realization that he was _literally_ turning to ash, and that he was never going to see the man in front of him again, unless he ended up in that... _other place_ that the two of them had believed in, so long ago.

For just a moment, he wished it to be real.

Steve, on the other hand, had no time to process what was going on until Bucky fell to the ground in a cloud, his body not even stirring the leaves. Not a trace of what used to be the man that Steve loved so dearly remained, the remnants of his existence floating out of his reach on a gust of wind. It was only then that Steve hauled himself towards the area where Bucky had been located not even a few seconds before, reaching out to feel that familiar brush of skin one last time.

He would have sobbed, screamed, and plead for the one person that mattered most to him in this world to return, yet his voice was lost in his throat, snuffed out with so many others. 

_"Oh god."_

When the dust cleared and the breeze stopped, the silence that followed could be heard for trillions of miles... and yet, the collective sorrow of the universe, coupled with the overwhelming feeling of emptiness in the moments that followed were amplified in such a way that Steve was convinced that the planet had stopped rotating altogether.

The sound of silence had never been as deafening as it was now.

**Author's Note:**

> This is very inspired by the song "Come Back When You Can" by Barcelona. Let's all cry together, shall we?


End file.
